The Key Ingredient

I have found that there is one key ingredient in successful storytelling: vulnerability.

I have worked with stories throughout the entirety of my career – both as a mental health counselor and as a filmmaker. Most recently, as author of StoryFind: the Handbook for Finding and Telling Your Nonprofit’s Most Impactful Stories (Page Two Press, Oct. 25, 2023). I have found that there is one key ingredient in successful storytelling: vulnerability.

Organizations struggle to share their stories effectively when they fear rather than embrace vulnerability; when it is avoided rather than encouraged. The result is stories that are watered down, uninteresting and lacking in human connection.

It is human nature to avoid vulnerability; after all, it is defined by Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary as “capable of being physically or emotionally wounded, open to attack or damage.” It’s only natural that we would want to dodge it.

The problem with staying safe, though, is that vulnerability is what connects us to others. And if you’re finding your organization’s storytelling efforts are ineffective, it’s likely that vulnerability is missing from the equation.

Created for Relationship

God created us for relationships and those relationships are cultivated through trust and vulnerability. There are between 600 to 800 stories in the Bible alone. Each one is designed by the God of vulnerability with the goal of leading us deeper into knowledge of who he is and therefore, leading us further into a relationship with him.

As God tells us stories about himself, he opens himself up to harm in the process. He is the infinite giver of himself. He doesn’t hold back, and he asks us to do the same.

Figuring out where to start in telling a vulnerable story can be daunting.

Figuring out where to start in telling a vulnerable story can be daunting. It’s all well and good to make up a story about an inanimate object like our journalist friend Rob Walker, but how do you find your organization’s own stories that will inspire your audience into a deeper relationship with you?

Finding Your Story

While I share the entirety of a process in my book StoryFind, I’ll summarize a bit here. In graduate school, we worked to answer the question: what would help someone grow if they walked into your counseling office?

We learned that the key ingredient to growth was the client’s relationship with the therapist. The same thing applies across the board with storytelling. Work on yourself first: your motives in telling a story, your heart for the storyteller and your methods for keeping them safe in the process.

Great interviewers possess the personal ability to:

• Create trust and motivation
• Practice empathy
• (Actually) listen

There are practical steps you can take to cultivate these disciplines, but let’s look closer at (actually) listening.

Actual Listening

Actual listening is not only hearing the words someone is saying but also understanding the underlying message being communicated. Here are three simple things to cultivate actual listening when having a conversation with a storyteller:

1. Eliminate mental distractions: be in the moment with the person in front of you.
2. Don’t think about responding: if you’re thinking about what to say next, you are no longer listening.
3. Look beneath the surface: clarify that you’re understanding what your storyteller is intending to communicate and ask additional questions to dive to deeper layers.

As you cultivate your skills as a listener, you will naturally find yourself diving into the lives of others. As you dive into the lives of others and demonstrate that you are a safe and trustworthy source, you’ll find yourself with a wealth of stories at your fingertips. These stories will become your organization’s greatest assets! Make it your mission this year to find and tell one story (with vulnerability!) each quarter. I can’t wait to hear your results a year from now!

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Kristin Sukraw is an award-winning storyteller, executive producer, licensed counselor, and national speaker. She is author of the new ground-breaking book StoryFind: the Handbook for Finding and Telling Your Nonprofit’s Most Impactful Stories. When not on the road, Kristin enjoys living in Nebraska with her husband and daughter. Learn more at StoryFindFilms.com, and reach Kristin at Kristin@storyfind.com.

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